Shannon and Felix - Morning after

[shannonteverius]

Sunlight filtered into the bedroom, dancing over the sleeping blond in the bed and making his golden hair shine. The scene was picturesque, like a fairy tale before the spell of sleep was broken. Even the sleeper was resistant to the pull of morning but eventually he stretched and admitted defeat. His body felt rested and he smiled, enjoying the feeling.

A few delicious aches in his movements brought his thoughts back to the previous evening and he remembered the stranger, Thomas, and what they had done together. Never in his life would he have imagined being in a bed with two men. It had been novel and fun but it was so unlike him. Felix seemed to have enjoyed it though.

Thoughts of his lover made Shannon reach out, searching for the man who should be sleeping beside him but the space was empty, the sheets cool. With a start his eyes flew open and he searched the room for Felix, finally exhaling when he saw him sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Good morning," he said.

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[harrowgate]

Felix had been awake for some time, but had not managed to make his way out of bed. His greatest effort had been to acquire his violet silk dressing gown and wrap himself in it. Otherwise, he sat silently in contemplation as the sun glimmered through the half-curtained window.

The memory of the night before was fresh in his mind, if vague and distorted. The things he remembered... they couldn't possibly be real. Shannon's sleeping face was beautiful and perfect as always. Watching him sleep, Felix could tell himself that nothing had changed.

But when Shannon woke, for a split second Felix was afraid he would have to restrain him, such a look of panic flashed across his face for a moment. He relaxed when Shannon did. "Good morning," Felix answered, his voice sounding dry and strained by the night before. "How is your head?"

[shannonteverius]

Shannon sat up slowly, considering the question. "Fuzzy," he said, his hand rising to rub at his temple. He didn't have a hangover but there was a haze over the previous evening in his mind. He hadn't drunk enough to warrant the effect and his brow furrowed in confusion. "We..." He swallowed and looked at his lover, his eyes questioning.

[harrowgate]

Felix tensed down his spine, through his shoulders, but he took care not to allow it to show in his face. If Shannon remembered what Felix thought he remembered, that made it real. And then...

He never feared their fights, or dreaded having an argument with Shannon. A part of him even relished most of their disagreements -- and the passionate fury that often followed. Not this time. If Shannon was angry, betrayed, or jealous, then Felix had no defense against him. Against the things he already feared that Shannon would say to him.

"I'm afraid I'm going to need you to say it," Felix answered, quietly.

[shannonteverius]

Shannon could hardly believe it, let alone say it. They had allowed another man in their bed. No, not their bed. That would have been unforgivable, but they had let a stranger come between them, quite literally in fact.

"I don't even remember his name," Shannon said.

[harrowgate]

Shannon did not seem angry. At least, not yet. Felix could not let himself relax... though he had never seen his lover quite so baffled or at a loss for words.

"Neither do I," Felix admitted. His deceitful memory had settled, instead, on the very clear sensation of heat and pleasure, and the sound of his own voice crying out without reservation -- a lack of inhibition he nearly never allowed himself in bed with Shannon. Felix flushed red, and glanced away toward the window.

[shannonteverius]

Shannon remembered the sounds of pleasure coming from his lover at another's hand. He remembered his own pleasure as well. Last night had been real.

"Did you enjoy it?" he asked. The answer was obvious but he needed to ask anyway. He couldn't ask the question he really wanted the answer to.

[harrowgate]

"I suspect the answer to that question is obvious," Felix answered, though he sounded more strained than snappish or bitter. A significant part of him expected Shannon to blame him for thoroughly enjoying their mysterious bedmate. "We both did."

[shannonteverius]

Yes, they had. No sense in denying it, and doing so wouldn't dispel the unease curling in Shannon's belly. "How did this happen?" he asked in a rush. The answer to that should have been obvious as well, and part of it was, but the details slipped away when he tried to grasp them. All he could remember was that he had wanted the stranger. In that moment he had wanted him more than anything.

Shannon looked at Felix. His lover was back lit by the window, a shadow and somehow far away even in their own bedroom.

"Come here," he said. [image: harrowgate: by honeybread (vulnerable)] Felix Harrowgate (harrowgate http://harrowgate.dreamwidth.org/profile) replied to a comment you left in your Dreamwidth entry "Shannon and Felix - Morning after" http://shannonteverius.dreamwidth.org/969.html. The comment they replied to was:

Shannon remembered the sounds of pleasure coming from his lover at another's hand. He remembered his own pleasure as well. Last night had been real.

"Did you enjoy it?" he asked. The answer was obvious but he needed to ask anyway. He couldn't ask the question he really wanted the answer to.

The reply was:

"I suspect the answer to that question is obvious," Felix answered, though he sounded more strained than snappish or bitter. A significant part of him expected Shannon to blame him for thoroughly enjoying their mysterious bedmate. "We both did."

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[harrowgate]

Felix turned away from the window, surprised by the edge in Shannon's question, and then doubly surprised by his lover's request for closeness. They had never been shaken quite like this before, and Felix did not know how to comfort -- either to provide it, or receive it. He only knew how to protect himself.

Not knowing exactly what Shannon wanted, Felix rose from where he had been sitting, and came around to Shannon's side of the bed to sit beside him. Obedient, quiet, like he was following an order.

Once seated again Felix lifted his gaze to look into Shannon's eyes, beautiful and clear blue even first thing in the morning, surrounded by that tousled blond hair. "You don't know why we chose that, last night," he said softly, with only the barest hint of a question at the end. "You don't know why we suddenly wanted something we've never even discussed before."

[shannonteverius]

Felix's closeness helped but it wasn't enough. Shannon wanted to sink his fingers into his lover's hair, pulling him close and drown them both in a kiss until all the fear faded away. Instead, Felix's words stopped him cold.

"No," he said, an edge entering his voice. "Do you?"

[harrowgate]

"I have my suspicions. It doesn't change what happened." Rarely did Felix ever reach out to initiate a touch that wasn't intending to lead directly to the bedroom, but now, he rested one hand lightly on the blanket covering Shannon's leg. It was almost an absent gesture.

"I think we were influenced. Perhaps by magic."

[shannonteverius]

"Magic?" The horror of the idea made Shannon's face pale. "Can someone do such a thing?"

[harrowgate]

Darling, you have no idea what horrors magic can wreak. Felix shut his eyes briefly. "The Cabal has its rules for exactly this reason. Not all practitioners are as stringent. But if it were really magic, I should have felt it, sensed it."

That was what had woken him and kept him awake: the realization that he should have known what was happening, but had sensed nothing. "I simply don't know what else it could have been. "

[shannonteverius]

Felix's ignorance did nothing to calm Shannon's fear. His lover was a powerful wizard. If Felix was in the dark, that did not bode well. And so, like many an uncomfortable topic, Shannon decided to skip this one.

"Did you want it?" he asked. "I know you did last night but...before?"

[harrowgate]

That question was a trap, even if Shannon did not mean it as one. Felix was not very good at lying directly, especially not to a directly-asked question. "Before last night, I couldn't imagine it," he answered, which was truthful enough -- he couldn't have imagined Shannon allowing anyone else to touch him.

[shannonteverius]

That didn't answer Shannon's question but it opened another one. "And now?" Could Felix imagine it now? Would he want it again?

Was Shannon not enough for him?

[harrowgate]

"Now..." Felix hesitated, then looked up to meet Shannon's eyes once more. "Last night, you were magnificent. Radiant with pleasure. I remember you, clearly, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't want to see you like that again."

[shannonteverius]

The flattery took the edge off Shannon's panic and he smiled softly but the fear remained. "You're going to look into this, aren't you?" The question was part query, part plea, part demand.

[harrowgate]

Those words sparked something warm and unusual in Felix's heart. Shannon knew him so well, knew what he would do before he said a word. Instead of being pulled apart by what had happened, there was a closeness, a mutual understanding, that seemed to be growing between them. After a brief silence, Felix moved his hand from Shannon's leg to take one of his hands. "I will, darling. I'll find out what happened."

[shannonteverius]

"Good." It wasn't enough of a reassurance but it was a start. Shannon had faith that Felix would solve the problem but if Shannon ever saw that man again he would rip him to shreds.

Even as he thought this, he knew it wouldn't happen. The best thing would be to never see him again. Shannon hoped he never did. A choking sense of fear gripped him as he thought of Felix seeing the stranger again, especially without him. No/. It wouldn't happen. It couldn't happen.

"Felix," he said, "kiss me."

[harrowgate]

"Shannon, darling..." Felix shifted closer to him, reaching to draw his lover into his arms, gathering him up from the luxury pillows of their bed. He did not hesitate to do as Shannon desired, cradling the back of his elegant neck as he drew Shannon in to kiss him. Soft, and lingering to start, just to feel him near and warm once again.

[shannonteverius]

Shannon's arms wrapped around Felix, pulling him closer. If his fingers dug a little harder than usual, he made no sign of noticing. His lips parted, tongue darting out for a familiar taste and not a stranger's.

[harrowgate]

The scent, the feeling of Shannon in his arms, so well-known and reassuring, overtook Felix's senses and settled -- for the moment, anyway -- the fluttering tension in his heart. He tipped his chin to part his lips and grace Shannon's tongue with the brush of his own. His arms curled tightly around his lover, more possessive than was usual for Felix, and very nearly pulled Shannon into his lap, but for the blanket still separating them.

[shannonteverius]

Shannon all but purred in Felix's arms. The feel of his lover's desire for him helped to ease more of the tension from his body and he melted into Felix, leaning back to tip them both over into laying on the bed. It was rare for Felix to be above him and he smiled as he broke the kiss so he could look up into Felix's face, surrounded by a curtain of fiery silk. He was so beautiful. Shannon caressed Felix's cheek and pulled him down to kiss him once more.

[harrowgate]

Felix's only thought when Shannon sank back into their bed was to be as near to him as possible. His long fingers cradled the back of Shannon's neck to lay him on the bed once again, and he drew himself along Shannon's side, curled above him, wrapped in his arms. The violet silk of his dressing gown half-slid from one bare shoulder, revealing that in the haze of the night before, Felix had gone to bed nude, and indeed wore nothing beneath the robe now.

His tongue dipped tenderly between Shannon's lips as Felix caressed a hand up along his lover's arm. He wanted to feel Shannon's arms around his neck, holding on to him, treasuring him. And, at least for now, only him.